Please, Moony?
by WiseGirl
Summary: A series of dialogue fics where Sirius asks Remus for some things... SLASH, of course :D Please read and review
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: This is mine!**

**JK: No it's not.**

**Me: Yeah, I guess you're right **

"Pleeeeaaase?"

"No."

"Remus! It's not that big of a deal. Please?"

"_No." _

"Fine. Be like that. But when I fail History of Magic and can't do it for NEWTs, you're gonna miss me sitting next to you…"

"Oh yes, how will I live without your constant talking and doodling all over my notes?"

"You know you love me."

"_Definitely_. I just _can't _resist the charms of Sirius Black."

"Hey, no need to get sarcastic! Go on, Remus, _please?"_

"Sirius! N-O spells _no! _

"Do you want me to beg? Okay, fine, I'll beg. Oh, Remus Lupin, divine light of my life, wont you grant me one simple favour? I know that you must be _terribly _busy, but if you'll just take a moment from your hectic life and assist me in writing my essay, I would be eternally grateful!"

"Sirius, get off the floor. I appreciate the gesture, but kneeling and bowing is only going to get your robes dirty."

"No it won't… Oh. Urgh."

"Yes, urgh. _Scourgify. _When are you going to learn that I'm always right, Padfoot?"

"I already know that you're always right. That's what I love most about you."

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Sirius."

"On the contrary, dear Moony, flattery will get me _everywhere.'_

'If you say so.'

'_Please, _Moony?'

'Sirius, you _know _those eyes only work when you're Padfoot!'

'…'

'Don't you dare! Sirius, I mean it!'

'Woof.'

'I'm not going to… I… ARGH! Why are you so adorable in dog form? Change back.'

'…'

'Now!'

'Gosh Remus, you're scary when you're strict. You come over all… animal.'

'Sirius, I'm a _werewolf. _I'm supposed to be scary _all _the time.'

'Nahh, you're one of the most harmless people I know. Next to Peter, of course.'

'You scare me sometimes, do you know that?'

'Why?'

'I'm not harmless in any way, shape or form! I mean, for Merlin's sake, Sirius!

'I'm sorry. Calm down, Remus.'

'No! It's not right for me to hang around with you! What's wrong with you?'

'Remus, sit down.'

'No! It's dangerous for me to even be near you! I don't… You shouldn't… ARGH!'

'Remus, _sit down!'_

'… Okay.'

'Come here. Right, you need to know some things. Number one, you are the loveliest person I know! You're smart, and sweet and kind and funny and sensitive and nice and-'

'Sirius.'

'Sorry. Umm… where was I?'

'Number two.'

'Oh. Er… Number two. Yes. Well, number two is… see, the thing with number two is… number two is…'

'For Merlin's sake, Sirius. Spit it out!'

'Okay. Here goes. The second thing is that, while you may have your quirks-'

'Being a werewolf isn't a quirk!'

'Ssh, let me finish. While you may have your quirks, ultimately, beneath all those quirks, you are Moony. The loveable nerd that livens up the Marauders no end. And that's why I… that's why I love you.'

'… love me?'

'Yeah. Turns out I'm as gay as a maypole, who knew?'

'B-But… I thought… I thought you like _girls_.'

'So did I. But then, one night before the full moon, you came into my bed to sleep, as you do-'

'Sssh!'

'-and I woke up in the morning and you were cuddling me. And I looked into your face and realised I loved you. I loved every little bit of this beautiful, broken, gorgeous boy with his arms wrapped around me so tightly I could barely breathe. And then you woke up, and looked at me, your face all sleepy. Do you remember what you said?'

'… n-no.'

'You apologised for holding me so tightly. And I realised that while I was in love with you, I could never tell you because you didn't feel the same as me and if I was hurt, you'd blame yourself. So I swore to myself that I wouldn't tell you, but as you know, I'm not the best at keeping promises.'

'How long ago was this?'

'Third year. Merlin, how sad am I?'

'Third… How ridiculous.'

'Why? Why is it ridiculous?'

'Because, on the very same day, I fell in love with you.'

'Wha…?'

'Do you want to know why? After I apologised, you looked at me and said 'As if you could ever hurt me, Moony.' Jokily. So I argued that, in fact, I could hurt you pretty badly. And you stared at me and said, 'Yes, but I know you wouldn't. You're not just a werewolf, Remus, and never let yourself just be defined by that. Chocolate frog?' and you produced a chocolate frog from beside the bed. And I thought to myself, he's nice, sees me as a real person _and _he has endless supplies of chocolate. He's perfect.'

'Oh, Remus. So all along, you loved me-'

'And you loved me.'

'What a waste.'

'All those years that could have been spent being so in love it makes people sick.'

'Snogging in front of James to gross him out.'

'Snogging in front of _Peter _to see how red he goes.'

'Sounds wonderful.'

'Marvellous.'

'So… it seems that this is a little overdue, but ah well.'

'What do you-'

'-'

'-'

'That was _so _worth the wait.'

'You're as good as Rachel said you were.'

'Rachel said…? Moony, have you been snooping?'

'… no.'

'You did didn't you? Aww, you've gone all red. You're adorable, do you know that?'

'I am _not._'

'You are. You're the girl in this relationship, okay?'

'No! If anything happens, who do you think will be saving us?'

'You, but the fact still remains that you're adorable, and I'm almost six feet while you're only five feet-'

'Five and a _half, _Sirius!'

'-which means that I can just hug you, like so. And then lean down and kiss you, like so…'

'-'

'-'

'Okay. I'll be the girl, but only if you do that lots.'

'Of course, Moony. Now, about that essay…'

'No, I-'

'-'

'-'

'-'

"Okay! I'll do your essay! But Sirius Black, you owe me _big _time…"

**So there it is. Should I carry this on and make it like a series of conversations between them, or should I just leave it as a oneshot? Let me know in your review :D**

**Love and unicorns,  
Wisegirl xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm sorry I took so long to update :/ But I have now so YAY! :D**

**Thanks for the positive reviews, guys! I love it, but would prefer more :/ **

**This chapter doesn't take place directly afterwards, there'll be a bit of a gap between each one, but each will be about Sirius asking Remus for something. **

**So anyways, here it is!**

'Reeeemus…'

'No.'

'I didn't even _ask _that time!'

'I still knew what you were going to say.'

'… _How? _Can you read minds now as well as being amazingly smart and sexy?'

'Yes. Yes I can.'

'Really?'

'Of course not. Padfoot, I worry about you sometimes.'

'You sound like McGonagall when you say things like that. Anyway, how _did _you know what I was going to say?'

'It's all you've talked about for a couple of weeks now. And the answer's still NO_.'_

'… so that's a maybe?'

'Sirius. That's a no.'

'But _why? _Frank's girlfriend lets him!'

'Sirius! I am not your _girl_friend!'

'You're acting like a girl.'

'Am not! Why would you say that, it's just _mean!_'

'I'm sorry, have I upset you? What did I say?'

'It's not what you _said _it's the way you said it… oh, Merlin, I _am _a girl!'

'Yup. It's alright, I don't mind. Come here.'

'I love your cuddles. They're so warm and- SIRIUS!

'Sorry!'

'How many times do I have to tell you? I. Am. Not. Ready! So don't touch my arse!'

'Sorry sorry sorry.'

'Yes, well, you should be sorry.'

'…'

'…'

'_Please?'_

'Sirius! No! I don't want to do… _that _with you yet!'

'… d-don't you love me?'

'Sirius.'

'No no, it's fine. I see how it is. You don't love me enough. It's _fine. _J-just leave old Sirius B-black by himself, he'll be f-fine!'

'Are you _crying?'_

'… n-no.'

'Come here, you daft thing.'

'No.'

'Fine, I'll come to you.'

'_No!'_

'Siri_us.'_

'Don't _do _that!'

'… what?'

'I don't like it when you sigh at me like that. It makes me feel about five years old.'

'Then don't do things that make me want to sigh.'

'I can't help it. It's just the way I am.'

'Yes, well.'

'Well what?'

'Well, sometimes I wish you were different.'

'… do you really mean that?'

'Yes!

'…'

'No… Oh, I don't know! Just… don't pressure me to do stuff, okay! I don't like it.'

'Okay. I wont do it with you until you're ready.'

'…'

'…'

'Stop it!'

'Stop what?'

'Looking at me like that!'

'Like what?'

'All… _sexy!'_

'I'm not doing anything Remus. If you think I look sexy, it's just cus you want me.'

'I… I don't.'

'Yes you do. You want me _bad, _Moony.'

'N-no…'

'Yup. You do. You want me to do things like _this…'_

'D-don't… touch me… there… I…'

'Ooh, you've got goosebumps.'

'Sto… stop...'

'Now Moony. You don't really mean that.'

'I d-do…'

'Okay.'

'O…kay?'

'Yes okay. I'll stop.'

'Oh. It's not necessary for you too sit across the room though.'

'It is. If I get any closer I'll… what's the word? Ah yes - _ravish _you.'

'Oh.'

'Yeah.'

'…'

'…'

'Fine!'

'… what?'

'Fine! You can _ravish _me.'

'Seriously? Remus are- are you serious?'

'No, you're Sirius.'

'Oh ha ha, very funny. But… Are you sure?'

.'Yes. But Sirius Black, you owe me _big _time…'_

**Again, PLEASE REVIEW, and I'll love you forever :D**

**Also, anyone who recognises the Friends quote gets a cookie xD**

**Love and unicorns,WiseGirl xx**


	3. Chapter 3

'Remus.'

'Yeah?'

'I want to help.'

'…help with what?'

'The Order. I can help, Remus! It's ridiculous you not letting me join! Please, I-'

'No.'

'But-'

'I said _no, _Sirius!'

'Why not?'

'Because you're _you.'_

'What does that have to do with anything?'

'Any secret organisation with Sirius Black in it is bound to end in disaster.'

'I'm not a _child, _Remus.'

'That's funny, because you're sure acting like one.'

'And you're acting like my mother!'

'You don't mean that.'

'I bloody well do!'

'But… you _hate _your mother.'

'Yeah, well.'

'…'

'…'

'Remus…'

'…'

'Remus. I didn't necessarily mean you were acting like _my _mother. God knows we wouldn't still be together if you were. I just meant you're treating me like a little kid who needs to be protected.'

'You _do _need to be protected.'

'Granted. But I want to help end this war, Remus. I want to fight with you guys. I get so frustrated when you're all out doing your bit to save us all, and I'm sitting at home watching muggle soap operas.'

'You enjoy them. I overheard you sobbing at one of them the other day.'

'Yes, but to be fair Brad was- That's not my point. My point is that you can't treat me like a child, Remus. I'm just as likely to be hurt or killed waiting at home for you, and I've already told you how I want to die, haven't I?'

'Fighting.'

'Exactly. When I eventually die, I want to fight and kick and scream every step of the way. And I want to do it by your side, Remus.'

'I… Of course, Sirius. Of course. I just… I can't imagine ever losing you. I don't know what I'd do. Sometimes, I just want to unzip my skin-'

'Ew.'

'-and tuck you inside with me. Because that way we'll never be apart. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you, Sirius. I think I'd lose myself.'

'I wouldn't let you.'

'I don't think you'd have much say in the matter, being dead and all.'

'I'll haunt you.'

'And get stuck on earth forever? You're far too fond of yourself to do that. No, you'd go to the big dog house in the sky and leave me alone.'

'Well, even if I did, I'm not planning on doing it soon. Now, come here.'

'…'

'…'

'Sirius…'

'Yeah, babe?'

'You're right. Join the order. I'm sure it could benefit from your presence.'

'Aw babes. Thanks-'

'But.'

'But?'

'As always…'

'Yeah?'

'You owe me big time.'

'I know babe. I know.'

**There will be 3 more chapters, I have decided. The next two will be slightly more serious matters, but I'll try my best to not make them reeeaaally depressing.**

**Please review, it would take like 2 minutes and would make my day :D**

**Love and unicorns,WiseGirl xx**


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